The Hoff is love

The holiday of love is more a celebration of the bottom line than of endless love. Still, no matter how commercialized the holiday becomes, being hit with Cupid’s proverbial arrow on February 14 still makes people feel loved.

So even though your significant other says they don’t care about Valentine’s Day, they’re lying.

If you’ve just received the memo and don’t know how to plan a last-minute day with your lover, check out these events. You’re welcome. (All “thank you” boxes of chocolates can be sent to SN&R, care of Jenn Kistler.)

Tell your partner to take a hike … with you. Yuba Historical Society will lead a hike up to Cathedral Peak in the Sutter Buttes, where there are towering volcanic formations and romantic views of Bragg Canyon. The hike will be Sunday, February 14, from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. Cost is $35 for non-YHS members. Call (530) 846-3024 to register and get meeting directions or visit www.yubahistory.com.

The silent treatment. If you hate The Phantom of the Opera Broadway musical, you’ll love the 1925 silent film, if for no other reason than the lack of singing. The film retains the novel’s horror quality, perfect for Valentine’s Day snuggling. The movie will show Sunday, February 14 at 7:30 p.m. at Guild Theatre, 2828 35th Street. Tickets are only $5. Hell yeah.

The Hoff—’nuff said. Nothing says romance like former Baywatch star David Hasselhoff serenading a crowd at Cache Creek Casino Resort on V-Day. Check out YouTube videos for “Crazy for You” and “Je T’aime Means I Love You” to get in the mood. Yeah, they’re not that deep—but the Germans love him. The show is Sunday, February 14 at 8 p.m. Tickets are $45-$65. Cache Creek’s Club 88, 14455 Highway 16 in Brooks; (530) 796-3118; www.cachecreek.com.

Check out the Night&Day listings on page 38 for more Valentine’s or anti-Valentine’s events.