Tacky church scandal

Got a spicy question about Mexicans?
Letters will be edited for clarity cabrones—unless you’re a racist pendejo. And include a hilarious pseudonym, por favor, or we’ll make one up for you!

Dear Mexican:

I'm a Mexican-American Catholic that is really upset about something I saw after Mass last night. As I waited for my son to come out of confirmation class (yes, I had already attended Mass myself), I noticed something really odd. I saw a grocery cart parked by a curb. It was odd because it was filled with all those things a vendor sells at parks. Then, I noticed another weird thing: Some lady setting up a little table by the front doors of the church with assorted items to sell. Wow! Was I really seeing this? What is going on with people? Have we become so desperate for money we are now hitting up churches like we do parks? I'm not sure if you have seen or heard of this before. I was really offended by this. I am also struggling financially like so many. I live paycheck to paycheck, but I still don't think I could resort to this. I felt it was tacky and just adds to the stereotypes we already have to deal with. What do you think of this?

—Dazed and Confused Mexican

Dear Wabette:

You have issues with working-class folks trying to make a buck after Mass, thinking it tacky. You know what else is tacky? A Roman Catholic Church hierarchy that allowed priests to rape boys and girls for decades and not only did nothing to stop it, they protected said pedophiles from the cops and joined their congregants in smearing victims and critics who pointed out the obvious—priestly pedophilia no es bueno. And guess what? More than a few of those victims were—you guessed it!—Mexicans. But since the church has done such a masterful job of brainwashing Mexican Catholics into believing that speaking out against the hierarchy is speaking out against God, our raza in the States has universally remained silent about this sex-abuse scandal—hell, you still see Latino politicos and immigrant-rights activists asking for the blessings of pendejos who should be spending life in prison for their cover-ups. Pray to God, pray to La Virgen de Guadalupe, even to La Santa Muerte if you must—but any Mexican who still gives money to the church might as well also donate to la migra.

I know why the Mexican man digs in the trash can: He can't believe what Americans throw away. My mom was from Northern Ireland, and we got many treasures over the years from walking past our neighbors' trash cans. She grew up dirt-poor and could not believe all the things Americans would waste and throw away. She honestly felt it was sinful. I dug through trash cans myself and had several yard sales over the years, which helped put me through college.

—Mary in Oregon

Dear Gabacha:

Gracias for answering your own pregunta so thoughtfully—please don't do it again, lest I get reduced to spinning tejanas on my finger at street corners for a living.

Why did all the conquerors come from Europe? And why were Africans conquered as slaves instead of Latinos? Are we more rebellious and not easy to control?

—Latina Grrrl

Dear Wabette:

Latinos not slaves? Look at Mexican Catholics.