Muffin-top construction

While some people use the name of a certain baked good as a slang reference to a body part below the belt, others use it for a body part just above the belt. The part brimming over the belt, in fact: the muffin top. Debate all you want, but there is likely no more appropriate way to augment this anatomical feature which defies containment by skinny jeans than with actual muffins. Unfortunately, there seems to be a dearth of vegan muffins in the marketplace. When one tires of Trader Joe's berry-and-bran muffs, then what? Sprouts Farmers Market (4408 Del Rio Road), luckily, offers some variation. On offer here are two flavors—raisin bran and Super Fruit, the latter of which contains berries and bits of walnuts. Buy them solo for 99 cents or in a four-pack for $2.99. It's nice to have options … for muffin-top construction.