Lost Boys: The Tribe

If there is a floor to the seemingly bottomless ocean of straight-to-DVD quasi-sequels, then—with sincere apologies to 8mm2—Lost Boys: The Tribe has surely reached it. The Tribe isn’t so much a remake of Joel Schumacher’s ridiculously-better-than-it-should-be 1987 The Lost Boys as it is a dumbed-down ripoff spiked with sub-Saw gore and shitty screamo. Two orphaned teen siblings (Tad Hilgenbrink and Autumn Reeser, no threats to the raw, youthful talent of Jason Patric or Kiefer Sutherland) get shipped off to a sleepy beach community that’s actually the playground for a vampire surfer gang (yes, even the vampires are backwards baseball-cap-wearing dildos these days). Corey Feldman reprises his role as vampire hunter Edgar Frog, but Corey Haim returns only briefly to set up Lost Boys 3.