It gets warmer

Utter the phrases “nonstop lesbian action” and “pillow fight” in the same breath and any human being with a healthy sexual appetite is sure to conjure up images of scantily clad women in the throes of pillow-walloping foreplay. But it doesn’t always work out that way—or at least it didn’t at last Wednesday’s grand opening of Club Pillow Fight, a new ladies’ night inside Badlands.

The club’s MySpace page (www.MySpace.com/clubpillowfight) called for ladies to come prepared to engage in a friendly round of pillow fights. Weapons, the site announced, would be provided. Inside, it took a while to entice clubgoers to sign up for a bout, but eventually a first tentative pillow fight was underway. Armed with their feather-stuffed arsenal, two women took positions on a raised platform in the center of the club’s dance floor. A large crowd gathered around to choose a favorite lady and cheer her on, and the warriors proceeded with their mutual thwacking. From the first blow, any erotic visions immediately were replaced with images of the ladies being whisked off to the emergency room. Luckily, the fights remained good-natured, and despite several falls from the platform, no injuries were incurred.

As for the go-go dancers, they were a no show. But local musician Liani Moore, one of the club’s promoters, was quick on her feet, and swiftly persuaded a female reveler to stand in. With a little help from the deejay, who spun a selection of electroclash, club hits and indie, the lone go-go girl was able to rouse the crowd into joining her on the dance floor.

Still, the deejay made some significant errors, spinning a disjointed set and playing several songs repeatedly—even fans of Shiny Toy Guns get tired of “Le Disko” on the third listen. The club would be better off canning the guy and replacing him with a female deejay who might better relate to the clientele.

But at least the club delivered on the anticipation it had created, with a healthy dose of lesbian erotica—in this case, flashing clips of steamy girl-on-girl action. One real-life couple did its part for the nonstop lesbian action by using the dance floor’s railing as a stabilizer for some intense grinding. Observing with a giggle, one nearby woman said, “I can’t believe they’re doing that on a Wednesday.” Clearly she’d never heard of “hump day.”

Overall, despite a few minor kinks, Club Pillow Fight seemed to come off as a success. The nearly 100 women and handful of men in attendance laughed, danced and had a good time. One the other hand, the promoters of the night have a difficult task of ahead of them. Lesbians are notorious nesters, and convincing them to leave the comfort of their homes on a Wednesday night will be tricky. Pillows are useful for staying in bed, too.