Gratuitous cannabis

Am I supposed to tip the medical marijuana delivery person?

—Mrs. Griffen

That a great question. The tip was already “baked into” the price of the baggie back in the day of weedman. (“Weedman” is a generic term denoting someone of any gender that sells weed in an underground economy sort of way.) Tipping wasn’t necessary.

These days, with many a cannabis delivery person being an employee rather than a sole proprietor, it’s probably a good idea for tipping to become a regular thing.

But how much? I talked (texted, really. Who talks on the phone anymore?) to Martin Olive from Vapor Room delivery service in San Francisco, and he told me that not only do most of his clients leave a tip, but that 10 percent seems to be the going rate.

Ten percent may seem like a more than decently sized tip, especially if someone is purchasing an ounce or a bunch of concentrates, but keep in mind that a delivery service is a great convenience, especially for folks that live in the boonies. How much would it cost you in time and money if you had to drive from Galt to Sacramento or from Salinas to Santa Cruz just to purchase cannabis?

Of course, tipping is optional, and you are free to tip or not tip whatever amount you feel is correct. If you don’t have much money, maybe you could give them some snacks for the ride home. Do something to let them know that you appreciate their time and service.

Slightly off topic, but not really: I have been tipping people with weed lately. So. Much. Fun. California law says that adults can give other adults up to 1 ounce of cannabis, so every once in awhile (more often than not, really), I will ask the valet, the bellhop at the hotel or the ride-share driver if they would rather be tipped in cash or cannabis. Turns out, most folks would love a nug, if only for the novelty of the action. I think we all should do more weed-tipping. To quote Freewheeling Franklin Freak of the Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers: “Dope will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no dope.” Tip well and flourish, my friend.

What’s all this I hear about weed making people vomit? I thought weed had the opposite effect.

—Hye Peremesis

It happens sometimes, mostly because of overindulgence. The human body has limits, you know. Smoking a bunch of giant dabs or eating two 100 miligram cookies is almost always a surefire ticket to Vomitville. No one really knows why but it is true: Low to moderate doses of cannabis can keep you from puking, but take too much and you get the opposite effect. Fortunately, scientists have found that a hot shower (and laying off the weed for a bit) will smooth you right out. Enjoy your moderation!