Confessions of a California State Fair addict

Exhilarating, blood-curdling amusement-park rides and photo booths. Frightfully giant stuffed animals. Handcrafted quilts, hypnotists and Joan Jett. Adorable animals and an urban farm. Wine slushies and blue-ribbon pies. Deep-fried everything on a stick. Is it any surprise people love the annual California State Fair? Actually, maybe love isn’t the right word. Try, instead, obsessed. Bonkers-devoted. Straight-up hooked. This year, the state fair runs July 11-27, and to celebrate its launch, we asked local readers to share their favorite things about the summer tradition. Their stories, memories and customs reveal a magical, obsessive world of wonder, one comprising commemorative oil paintings, gallons of chardonnay, pet chinchillas, impressively precise activity schedules and budgets, and decades’ worth of memories. These are people who plan all year for a two-week-plus event. They go multiple days, they drag unwilling friends in an effort to make new converts. It’s kind of cultlike, actually, and frankly, we’d be worried about their sanity—really, a commemorative oil painting?!—except we’re crazy-addicted, too.

Downright evangelical

You asked if I’m obsessed with the California State Fair.

Let’s just say that I have an oil painting of the state fair entrance in my dining room. It’s a memento from the time I organized a scavenger hunt at the fair for my birthday (July 27).

Not only am I obsessed, I am downright evangelical. For people who say they don’t like fairs or they don’t like the California State Fair, I ask, where else can you do all this in one place:

Bet on ponies, pet a sturgeon, buy a microwave tortilla warmer (that actually works really, really well), hear En Vogue, learn the history of Sun-Maid raisins, check out the chickens and resolve to get some yourself, get a cartoon portrait of yourself drawn, sign up for Alhambra water delivery, ride the monorail during the fireworks, eat homemade corn dogs from a guy who came all the way from Humboldt County, take home a snow globe with a picture of you and your mom, get hypnotized, taste wine, get a free redwood tree sapling, see a prizewinning quilt and wonder if you should start quilting, watch mutton bustin’, make butter in a cup, eat freshly pulled mozzarella, rock out with Pat Benatar, get your picture taken with a monkey, ride the giant swing, pay $1 to see a 3,000-pound steer.

And more: Pet a chinchilla, marvel at how tall corn grows, see a dozen piglets nurse, buy a cinnamon roll that tastes as good as it smells, have your palm read, cheer for the county exhibit from where you were born (Sutter County) and where you were raised (Nevada County), learn about Huell Howser’s house in Palm Springs, buy a white fur-lined cowboy hat with blinking LED lights, see horses dance, get fake fingernails, dip pretzels into so many dips, take in the glory that is MC Hammer from the swan boats in the moat, compare bear scat to raccoon scat, watch a baby chick hatch, have a personalized wooden sign made.

I have done all of these things. There is no place like it. I’m obsessed, for sure.

—Laura Kerr

via email

Fifty-four years in a row

On July 11, 2014, I will enter the California State Fair for the 54th straight year. I have a season pass, so I will attend all 17 great days.

My first years at the state fair were at the old location—Stockton Boulevard and Broadway. We all loved the old brick buildings, the flower-exhibit hall and many of the counties that exhibited year after year. My brother and I would come to the fair with our aunt, who worked at a food stand just behind the horse-racing grandstand.

It was decided that the state fair needed more room, so the state purchased land from a sheep-herding family in the area in which Cal Expo is located. I was there the year that Gov. Ronald Reagan cut the ribbon opening the new facility. It was first thought it would become a year-round facility—in fact, the first year it was open most of the 12 months.

For the last four years, including this year, I have purchased or received as a gift the annual pass, so for the last two years I have attended every day. Three years ago, I only attended 15 days. Each day is a different experience with something new to see and do.

Sometimes I attend the fair with my brother or some family members, but usually I go alone and meet lots of new people from all over the United States. I check the program to see what things are going on that might only be there for a few days, like the Splash Dogs.

On the first day of the fair, I check out the exhibit halls. I love the art buildings. Last year, I purchased three pieces of photo art. I love all the vendors selling their wares—it’s like a sideshow. I always have lunch and try to eat something different each day—things that you only eat at the state fair. I like to sit and relax and watch people from all walks of life. It’s a great snapshot of California life.

Yes, I am a state fair nerd.

—Gary Francis

as told to Jonathan Mendick

Zero limitations

I’m not a heavy drinker. I don’t drink at all most of the year. But the fair is different. Those wine slushies are just the best things ever. I love the strawberry one made with chardonnay. I end up drinking a lot of chardonnay during the fair, which is kind of weird. But you can buy a bottle for $14—it’s a way better deal than beer. The wine garden is also just the only cool outdoor space—it’s shaded with misters.

The California State Fair is like Disneyland. It’s an escape from reality. It’s only once a year, and you get to drink wine slushies, go on rides and see concerts. If it was a year-round thing, I would definitely go all the time.

I used to go when I was a kid. Then there was a period of maybe 10 years when I didn’t go at all. I was 22 when I went for the first time as an adult, and I’ve been back every year since. I’m 32 now. And for the past five years, it’s become a serious thing for me and my friends. I go four days a week—minimum. I have a season pass, so sometimes I’ll just pop in for a couple hours. I’ll grab dinner and get my fair fix.

Usually, about 10 of us will meet at the wine garden, then we’ll go to Raging Waters during the day, return to wine slushies, hit the animal exhibits, see a concert and then ride some rides. A good day ends underneath the fireworks.

There are great concerts, too. I’m really excited for Joan Jett this year. Last year, I flew down friends from Portland, Ore., to see “Weird Al” Yankovic. There was also a great Michael Jackson tribute band with a Michael Jackson impersonator. He blew my mind—amazing performance.

The food definitely isn’t the healthiest, but it’s so good. I get the corn on the cob just about every day. The blooming-onion stand is one of my all-time favorites. It’s an onion that’s breaded, deep fried, sliced open and absolutely delicious.

All the exhibitions are amazing, like the Furs and Feathers display with rabbits and birds. It’s indoors, away from the heat and with cute, cuddly animals. The art shows are great, too, because they feature a lot of local, younger artists.

And this sounds weird, but one of the biggest thrills is seeing the animals. Maybe it’s because so many of us live in Midtown and didn’t grow up on farms. It’s just really cool to be with your friends and see a huge cow or a pig that just gave birth.

I’ve actually spent my whole life avoiding rides that put you upside down—until last year. Now, I have this whole new world to explore. The Zipper might have been my favorite—you’re trapped in a cage and it’s superterrifying. I feel like I see it broken down all the time, which just adds to the whole experience. I like the giant swing, too—it goes up way higher than it should. I saw a video once where a kid fell out of it, and I thought I’d never go on that ride. But then I did.

I save up for three months before the fair each year, and I budget about $100 per day so I can enjoy with zero limitations.

—Ira Skinner

as told to Janelle Bitker

Confessions of a 10-year-old

I love the state fair because the animals there are so cute, and the rides are superfun. When we’re there, we like to go to the horse corrals and see the police horses. My personal favorite animals are the pigs. I like the water ride that’s in the midway and the bumper cars and, well, everything else! The state fair is my favorite place to go during the summer besides the pool.

—Eleanor Smiley

age 10

via email

Did he mention there’s a wine garden?

The state fair didn’t become religious the way we do it now until late high school. Before, it was just, “Let’s just go, it’ll be fun.” But for the last four years, we’ve gone 10 or 12 days each summer. Not anyone can go. There’s an audition. It’s almost like we haze them.

What’s their endurance level? How long can they last during the day? How many drinks can they have during the day in the heat? We’re really like, “Well, let’s see if they can go.”

Now, we have a state fair group on Facebook, where we all kind of prep ourselves for those two weeks. Everyone plans and updates the page with any deals that are coming up. We used to be so obsessive. We would plan details like, “What are you going to bring? Make sure you are going to bring this; don’t bring this.”

We have a schedule: My friend Alexis and I, and my wife, Julie, are usually the first group to go. Whoever else wants to go in the first group can, but it’s usually just us three.

We plan our meals. It’s so funny to say out loud, because you don’t think about it until you actually do it. Alexis usually has a slice of pizza and I have a corn dog from the same place, the jumbo corn dog place. We get that out of the way. It’s like a checklist.

Then, we usually hit up the commercial buildings with all the stupid ShamWows and all that stuff. We’ll go and find the pretzel-dipping station and try the new dips that it has, which is so stupid, but so awesome.

After that, it’s usually around 1 p.m., and that’s a good time to start going to the wine garden. And so we go to the wine garden, and that’s usually when friends who have taken a half-day will roll in. They’ll kind of catch us in the middle of a bottle of wine, and then they’ll get the next rounds. And usually we’ll try to leave the wine garden, but then someone else will show up and buy a bottle of wine, and we’ll have to stay.

So then, we leave the wine garden around 4 p.m., and we’ll probably hit up other stuff around it, like the petting zoo, which is awesome, and all the livestock and the horses. And then we usually head back to the wine garden, and just get a whole bunch of food—everyone goes out and gets food and brings it back. And then we’ll end up riding the rides all night.

Two years ago, my wife—then girlfriend—saw that the wine-slushy machines were still running, but the whole wine area was closed, and we went back there and filled all of our souvenir cups with wine slushies. And as we were walking off, security ran up and didn’t kick us out, but did make us pour all of them out in front of him.

I’ve asked my friends to think about this question before, “Why do you love the state fair so much? What’s the deal with it?”

Some of it lies in new and old traditions, nostalgia, being back with the same group, creating new memories. Part of it’s just this weird, fun no-holds-barred thing. It’s kind of just a free-for-all fun place.

Once you’re in, it feels like I don’t think about anything else. Like, if I don’t have to work that night, I’m like, “I’m going to have a million drinks, I’m going to eat a bunch of junk, I’m going to ride a million rides.” It’s just I don’t think about anything else; it’s almost like escapism.

I really wish some state fair officials would get at me to deejay or throw a party at the fair this year. That would be awesome.

—Shaun Slaughter

as told to Jonathan Mendick

Bring a date

The state fair is the best place to take a date. You get to walk and talk and drink a bit and get to know the person you are with.

I went to the state fair five times one year, each time with a different woman. It was great, until the volunteers at the wine garden started recognizing me and talking to me. It got uncomfortable a few times.

—Larry Pilgrim

—via email

Born-again addict

I’ve only lived here in Sacramento for a year, but I’m a born-again state fair addict.

Floral exhibits are my forte. Last year’s rainforest habitat, with all the creatures and everything, was amazing and so very original. I don’t have kids, but if I did I would most certainly take them to the state fair; the exhibits are just so educational.

I just love the horse shows. When I was in junior high school, I’d go to horseback-riding camps and be in heaven. The precision riding is particularly spectacular.

And those cold drinks are so nice on a hot day. And, oh goodness, those deep-fried Twinkies. They really do have such an array of things to eat. I love the linguica, but you name it, and the fair has it. My husband is a corn-on-the-cob guy. My absolute favorite is when they mix chocolate with—oh gosh—something really unusual. I can’t remember right now. But everything is just wonderful. Don’t go to lose weight, that’s for sure.

I don’t go on any of the rides anymore. I used to, back in the day. My favorite was the one where you stand in this room and it spins, and you’re off the floor because of the centrifugal force. It sounds scary, but it’s not. The others look quite exciting, but they’re not for me. Maybe if we had kids.

—Lisa Tarr

as told to Janelle Bitker

Better than traveling the world

I am the ultimate California State Fair fanatic!

For 17 days each summer, I devote virtually every day to the state fair! What is it about the fair that prompts me to buy a season pass every year and to attend just about every single day?!

Am I crazy?

First of all, for only $29.99, I can see dozens of concerts, like Maroon 5, the Fab Four, the B-52s, Chicago and the list goes on. I can’t think of a better deal in town. No nosebleed seats, either.

Secondly, people watching is second to none at the fair! It’s fun to leave the familiarity of my neighborhood and the people I see every day and experience why Sacramento has been called the most diverse city in the United States!

Thirdly, where else can I experience the cultural immersion of viewing fascinating, unique artwork and just steps away, see an array of livestock, an Arabian horse dance, or people doing all sorts of amusing things under the spell of a hypnotist. Fascinating stuff.

I’ve traveled the world, from Turkey to Tokyo, but our California State Fair in Sacramento never ceases to amaze, entertain, and entice me to return over and over again. I’m already counting down the days.

—Jennifer Williams

via email