Chelsea Smile, sugar baby

Chelsea Smile is just your average everyday intelligent, well-spoken 29 year old woman. She enjoys amateur geology & getting her hands dirty… But she also enjoys getting dolled up and parading her femininity. Pepperdine awarded her a full academic scholarship to study criminal psychology, she owns a bridal coordination company, plus, she’s a peer counselor.

And for the right price, she’ll be yours for as long as you can afford her.

In 2018, sites such as SeekingArrangement.com and Cuddle Companions showcase the literal girl next-door who’s just seeking some walking ’round money but isn’t interested in a relationship as a full-time gig.

Last holiday season, I climbed into bed with Chelsea, a Sacramento sugar baby, to cuddle and ask a few questions.

What can I call you that won’t make you hate me.

A girl seeking a mutually beneficial dynamic.

Can you describe how these relationships work?

Essentially it’s a service we’re providing to men who might not otherwise be able to get a date that turns heads. In exchange for gifts or donations, they get to walk into a room proudly, knowing the other men are looking at them and wanting to be them. They’re envied.

True or false: someone’s getting naked by the end of the night.

False. Sometimes, but not always. That’s where this differs from prostitution. Most men I meet aren’t looking for a purely sexual relationship. They want to be seen by other men with me on their arm because they want the status. It’s about power and ego, not sex. If sex occurs, it happens organically, like it would on any normal date. But it’s certainly not a given.

In a very cynical sense, what you’re describing sounds like many first dates, minus the charade.

Maybe, but I think it’s a myth that’s unfair and a little degrading to men to assume they only go on dates with women for sex. A lot of the men I meet want companionship. They want a therapist, a friend, a shoulder to cry on. They want someone to listen to them, to have nonsexual intimacy. They want flirting, and for whatever reason, they are unable to find these things by going on traditional dates. Many of the guys I meet have so much money that they don’t know what to spend it on, so they look for things or people or places. A lot of men paying for this type of scenario also don’t have time for traditional dating but still want a woman’s company, her laugh, her feminine opinions.

Sex work is often discussed in the context of human trafficking, but what you’re talking about sounds far different. These are two adults making a conscious choice to commodify affection.

What I do doesn’t belong anywhere near the human trafficking discussion. In fact, you could argue just as convincingly that it’s the men who are victims here, with the woman preying upon their vulnerabilities. I don’t believe that’s the case, but the argument is just as valid.

Some women will accuse you of undoing years of feminist progress by allowing men to objectify you.

To me, those women are the opposite of feminism. They’re hiding their bodies, hiding their femininity, and then attacking women like me who choose to utilize our beauty and sexuality. They’re shunning themselves. I feel like we’re doing more in terms of empowering women than they are. I’m using my intelligence to my advantage. This isn’t for the faint of heart.

Personally, I like being objectified. I like when somebody is proud to be with me, or is beaming when they introduce me to their friends and coworkers. I don’t mind being a trophy. That’s empowering to me and there’s nothing wrong with it. I certainly don’t feel the need to hide it or apologize for it.

Let’s say I take a girl like you out. What’s my bank balance looking like in the morning?

It varies, but it’s not uncommon for men to spend $500 an hour. I’ve gone out with industry executives, been to military galas; They range from doctors to truck drivers. There is no specific type of occupation.

At $500 an hour, I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you don’t see a lot of writers.

This is true.

Can men do this too?

There is actually a huge demand for men in this industry, both for gay and straight men. Believe me when I say that companionship will always be of high value, meaning for the right price there will always be the right company. I’m blessed with a very comfortable existence. I have a happy life.

Is that the feeling of empowerment?

Yes, absolutely. In fact, I feel empowered going against the common feminist narrative. I’m a strong enough woman to challenge gender-norms, even when they’re norms placed upon me by other women. That, to me, is what it means to be a strong female. What girl doesn’t want to be told they’re pretty, and get dolled-up in a cute dress to go out looking sexy and feeling desired?

You’re asking me that question?

Don’t you think?

I think I know enough to shut the fuck up here and let you do the talking.

Good boy.

At $500 an hour, you’ll have to use your imagination.

I’m sure we could work something out.

Let’s skip to the last question. Do you have an exit strategy? I’d imagine 401k plans for mutually beneficial dynamics are lacking.

True, there’s a shelf life for in this job. We have to take the money that we get from these men and reinvest it in ourselves. That could be putting ourselves through school, or starting a business, or networking and investing wisely. We can’t just spend what they give us, because it won’t last. We have to use what we get to build for our own futures.

So I’m gonna go out on a limb and assume your real name is not Chelsea Smile. Why not use your real name?”

Associating my real name with this line of work opens the doors for judgement in areas completely unrelated to the other companies I own. Besides, Chelsea Smile has roots from half my family’s origin, and it’s just an overall badass name because it’s relative to The Joker. Harley Quinn doesn’t have shit on me.

If people want to reach out to you with more questions, where can they get a hold of you?

Yeah, I’d be more than happy to answer any questions. xlashdollx@gmail.com.