Blow Energy Drink Mix

Letting a 9-year-old drink Red Bull is a subtle form of child endangerment, but the new energy-drink mix, Blow, sees to it that the destruction of our youth is a little more blatant. Blow is a white powder that comes in a small plastic vial (surprised?) and can be mixed with 16 ounces of any beverage. Even more shocking? It’s actually pretty good. If you mix it with water, it tastes like the bubble-gum junk they clean your teeth with at the dentist; the taste is minimal when mixed in any flavored beverage. Blow is sugar-free, and that metallic, acidic throat drip is nonexistent. If you can get past the degradation-of-society factor, Blow will pep up everything from carrot juice to a Miller Lite. Another plus: You don’t even need to smuggle it up your ass. Win-win, right?