Satisfries

“I need to wear fishnets and a negligee on Saturday,” I reminded myself as a friend and I pondered Burger King’s digital menu. The woman behind the counter pretended not to have heard my self-admonition as I ordered Satisfries and a gigantic Diet Coke. The Satisfries—Burger King’s new lower-calorie, lower-fat fries—arrived, and in their thick, crinkle-cut valleys of golden goodness, I saw my chance of fitting into Saturday’s Rocky Horror Picture Show costume fade away. I resolved to work it off in the gym, and dunked the first fry into some ketchup, the hot ridges capturing small pools of the cool condiment. Crispy, though not crunchy. Chewy, though not mealy. I immediately thought of baked steak fries, without the sogginess, and then devoured the rest. Satisfries’ 40 percent less fat and 30 percent less calories (than McDonald’s regular fries, it says in the fine print) is thanks to a batter coating the potatoes that keeps it from absorbing as much oil during frying. When you compare Satisfries to BK’s own fries, the differences are only 20 percent less fat and 20 percent less calories. Still, Satisfries are a slightly less guilty pleasure, one that you can enjoy in moderation and still look good while doing “The Time Warp.”