Cheesespread

Thankful for the Internet
I must say that when I look back over the year and give thanks, one thing that stands out, especially in relation to this column, is how grateful I am to still receive alternative viewpoints via the Internet (one of the most powerful inventions of modern man). ‘Cause believe me, people, if you take your news solely from American newspapers and television—all owned by the same mega-corps who profit from its lies and deceit—you are being kept completely in the dark about matters of utmost importance that will affect us and our children for decades to come.

I would know nothing about a lot of issues if I were not able to read (daily) about 20 different sites online that help give, piece by piece, a clearer picture of the truth when it comes to our government and its actions. Add this to books, films and lectures on the outside, and you can slowly become politically competent.

I get scared when I see regulations coming into play on the Net (even good ones, like those that banish child porn, because they will probably be used to shut down dissenting political views in the future).

Just look at this new Homeland Security Bill, which received completely one-sided mainstream-press attention that asked hardly any decent questions about its destruction of civil liberties, opting instead to bury the public beneath rumors of impending terror—"Osama Bin Laden is under your bed"-style bogeyman stories that always seem to arrive just in time for some new piece of fascist legislation.

McDonald’s sued over America’s obesity problem
When stuffing ourselves over the Thanksgiving holidays, we should not forget that we Americans are a nation of total fat-asses—compared to the rest of the world, anyway.

As if we needed proof of this, New York lawyers have filed a class action suit against McDonald’s, claiming the business has created an “epidemic of obesity among America’s children.”

While this is undoubtedly (partially) true—think of how many kids stuff their pie holes with vile, fast-food on a regular basis—the suit probably doesn’t stand a chance in court.

If attorneys could somehow prove, however, two things that I have long expected—one, that McDonald’s lard-boiled French fries and extra-sugary Coca-Cola both contain a powerful narcotic and, two, that the Ronald McDonald’s clown has for years actually been taking kids into the Mickey D’s bathroom and forcefully stuffing old burgers down their throats—the money-grubbers might have a case.

Weekly props
1. The Eagle’s Shadow: Why America Fascinates and Infuriates the World by Mark Hertzgaard

2. Harlem Globetrotters at Acker Gym (1/21)

3. Little Feat in Laxson (9/03)

4. Michael Jackson “Beat It” babysitting referral